When I asked my friend Paulina, the U.N. employee and recent Kenyan transplant, if she knew why Hollywood tends to invent African countries instead of using real ones in its movies and TV shows, she said, "Real Africa is too African. It's like putting imitation chicken flavor cubes in chicken soup."
Did Paulina just call Hollywood chicken? Yes, she did. And she'd better hope La La Land emissaries Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie don't swing by Kenya the next time they're in Africa to buy an orphan, or she'll be in for the best-looking verbal smackdown of her life.